top of page

Fear is a mask for desire

Fear and desire are intricately linked, with fear often acting as a mask that conceals our deepest longings.

Dear Petra,

Thank you for reaching out and sharing your fear of dogs. I understand that fear can be a challenging emotion to navigate, and I'm here to provide you with a comprehensive response to help you address your concerns.

Firstly, it's important to acknowledge that fear is a common reaction, and many people experience fear or anxiety around certain animals, including dogs. It's okay to feel this way, and you're not alone in your fear. Now, let's explore some steps that may assist you in overcoming your fear of dogs:

Take some time to reflect on your fear of dogs and try to understand its origin. Sometimes, fear can be triggered by a past negative experience (actual encounter with an aggressive dog or threat voiced by dog owners or parents that a dog would be unleashed unless the child did or didn’t do something), a lack of familiarity with dogs or there could be a cultural element to it. By gaining insight into the underlying cause of your fear, you can begin to approach it more effectively.

Consider educating yourself about dogs and their behavior. Learning about their body language, communication cues, and common traits can help demystify them and alleviate some of your fears. Additionally, gradually exposing yourself to dogs in controlled and safe environments can help desensitize you over time.

Reach out to friends, family, or a support group who can provide understanding and assistance in overcoming your fear. Sharing your concerns with others who have successfully dealt with similar fears can offer guidance, encouragement, and valuable insights.

If your fear of dogs persists and significantly affects your daily life, it may be beneficial to consult a professional, such as a therapist or counselor who specializes in anxiety disorders or phobias. They can provide you with tailored strategies and techniques to manage and overcome your fear effectively.

Consider gradual exposure therapy, which involves exposing yourself to dogs in a controlled and gradual manner, starting with less intimidating situations and gradually progressing to more challenging ones. This therapeutic approach allows you to confront your fear in a safe and supportive environment, helping you build confidence and resilience along the way.

Work on developing positive associations with dogs. Spend time observing well-behaved and friendly dogs from a distance, focusing on their positive interactions with others. Engaging in activities such as volunteering at an animal shelter, where you can interact with dogs under supervision, can also help shift your perception and build trust.

Remember to practice self-care throughout this process. Be patient and kind to yourself, as overcoming fears takes time and effort. Celebrate even the smallest achievements and milestones, as each step forward brings you closer to conquering your fear.

I hope you find these suggestions helpful. Feel free to reach out if you have any further questions or need additional support along your journey.

Throughout my deep working sessions, I have often encountered individuals who suffer from various phobias. I always try to embark on a transformative journey with them in order to break down those fears and transform them into desires. In this second part of my insight, I will outline a general approach to overcoming fears. It is essential to customize this approach to your unique situation and needs.

Fear and desire are intricately linked, with fear often acting as a mask that conceals our deepest longings. There must have been initial desire that created the attraction towards the object of fear, and then either the first encounter was traumatic or others (usually adults) tried to halt the longing by emphasising dangers (eg “dogs bite you”,” I’ll unleash my dog on you”).

By creating a "What Scares You" list, we can embark on a transformative journey of self-discovery, drawing out our hidden desires and gaining a clearer understanding of what we truly aspire to achieve. This rewriting emphasizes the connection between fear and desire, encouraging individuals to confront their fears and use them as a catalyst for personal growth and fulfillment.

Begin by making a list of everything that scares you. Be honest and open, allow yourself to explore even the most intimidating aspects of your life. It is important not to censor or judge your fears during this process. By writing them down, you acknowledge their existence and give yourself the chance to confront them.

Some fears may be so potent that you hesitate to write them down. However, it is precisely these fears that hold significant meaning and are worth including on your list. Push beyond your comfort zone and challenge yourself to articulate these hidden fears. They often reflect the desires and aspirations that you wish for deep down.

Once you have compiled your list, examine each fear individually. Consider the underlying desire that may be concealed within it. Fear often acts as a mask, disguising our true longings. By exploring the connection between fear and desire, you gain insight into what truly motivates and inspires you.

Now that you have identified the desires connected to each fear, it's time to develop strategies to overcome them. Break down each fear into manageable steps or actions that can help you gradually confront and conquer them. Consider seeking support from friends, family, or professionals who can provide guidance and encouragement along the way.

Facing fears requires courage and resilience. Recognize that fear is a natural part of growth and that by confronting it, you are embarking on a transformative journey. Practice self-compassion and celebrate small victories along the way. By developing resilience, you develop the strength to persevere and continue progressing towards your desires.

As you gain confidence in facing your fears, take inspired action towards realizing your desires. Break your goals into actionable steps, setting deadlines, and holding yourself accountable. Remember that progress is a process, and setbacks are opportunities to learn and grow. Stay committed to your path and celebrate each milestone achieved.

Creating a "What Scares You" list can be a profound exercise in self-discovery and personal growth. By confronting our fears, we unveil our hidden desires and gain clarity on the life we truly wish to create. With determination, resilience, and a willingness to take action, we can gradually overcome our fears and transform them into stepping stones towards a fulfilling and purposeful existence. Embrace the process, cherish your desires, and let fear guide you towards a future brimming with fulfillment and purpose.

41 views0 comments


bottom of page